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Chris Slininger

Be All You Can Be: Why Mentorship & Professional Writing is Important

Chris Slininger is a Captain in the U.S. Army and has served from the platoon to the strategic level, from Field Artillery to Counterintelligence to Human Resources. His passion and purpose in life is to serve others through kindness and generosity while uplifting and focusing on the power of mentorship. Otherwise, he can be found hanging out with his wife, pupper, and lifting heavy circles.


soldier writes after mentoring session

As I clicked end call on the conversation, the euphoric energy coursing through my veins drained out of me faster than a runaway train. The call effectively ended my third attempt to become an Army Strategist and my time as an active-duty officer. Eighteen months earlier, I promised my wife I would make three attempts to transfer out of my career field, and if it didn’t work out, I would leave active duty. I found myself sitting there reviewing the past several weeks. Allegedly, I had broken protocol when asking for a general officer letter of recommendation, and the general who had offered support revoked it because my O6, or boss’ boss’ boss, had not been informed about my intent. I was confused. Two days earlier, I reviewed the request with my boss and ensured everything was all set; they reviewed the request and told me to send it. I did not understand why neither my rater nor my senior rater had communicated my intentions while approving me to move forward with my request. It was an afternoon of exhaustion, fear, and wrenching of my dreams. I love the Army and have loved it since a sunny but chilly April day in Tim Horton’s 14 years ago when I devoured Colin Powell’s autobiography, My American Journey. How on earth did I end up here, putting in my release from active duty (REFRAD) request and now pulling the request back and staying on active duty.

 

Recently, the Army re-launched its “Be All You Can Be” campaign. At this point in my Army career, I felt the Army was more of being what we tell you to be. I’d spent my career trying to find a place to fit in – I didn’t fit in with Field Artillery, Military Intelligence, or the Counterintelligence sub-culture, and I had just tried to become an Army Strategist. I just never felt at home. Maybe it was time to try being all I could be somewhere outside of the Army. Plus, I had made a promise to my wife. Thus, with a heavy heart and over a week of praying, journaling, and seeking counsel, I watched the deadline pass while being ignored in the workplace. I sat down with my senior rater to inform them of my decision – I was leaving the Army in a year.

 

Over the next few months, I worked on all my out-processing requirements while waiting for my REFRAD and my career skill program application to be approved. In July, I started taking leave; I had 120+ days built up due to not taking leave over the COVID pandemic, being a company commander, and being in my latest billet (job). During my leave period, I took my project management professional course and began studying for my senior certified professional in human resources certification. Otherwise, I slept, relaxed, and worked out. Honestly, it wasn’t long enough to fully recover from the burnout I had finally hit.

 

Burnout is broadly understood as a psychological state of exhaustion stemming from persistent exposure to work-related stressors while lacking sufficient resources to cope with these stressors efficiently (Demerouti E., Bakker A.B. The Oldenburg Burnout Inventory: A good alternative to measure burnout and engagement. In: Halbeslen J., editor. Handbook of Stress and Burnout in Health Care. Nova Science; Portland, OR, USA: 2008. pp. 65–78. [Google Scholar]). Burnout is not in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM) 5 as an official diagnosis; however, it is covered by other terms such as adjustment disorder. When we look at burnout and professionals, especially in the service, we see them needing more resilience training, breathing techniques, meditation, and coping skills. What we fail to do as is look at the ecosystem and work backward to identify critical indicators and find ways to intervene early.

 

Intervening early in an individual’s path to burnout is vital to ensuring they can continue being fulfilled in their career. When an individual burns out, they’re experiencing a break in trust with the organization and themselves. The individual has worked harder and harder to prove their place in the tribe (work) but does not feel the connection and safety of belonging. So begins a downward cycle of the individual having to work more and work harder to prove themselves worthy of belonging until they achieve that sense or they reach burnout. If you’re a leader who enjoys seeing these “hard” workers, you may need to reevaluate your organizational culture.

 

As my leave progressed, I started my career skills program at an organization that held one of my few prominent childhood memories. While a great organization, the fit wasn’t there for me, so I kept looking for places to go. In December, I had an article, A Call to Modernize the Army Experience, published in Military Review Online. I had invested hours into writing my parting manifesto, as it were. These ideas, the removal of mandatory assignments, the creation of a junior officer counsel, and the creation of the total soldier app, were previously laughed at by peers and leaders. This time, someone reached out and expressed interest in my ideas and my career.

 

As I went through my career skills program and searched for a post-Army career, I kept returning to the Army culture. The Army Values, Soldier’s Creed, Warrior Ethos, and People First Strategy don’t exist in the civilian sector, no matter what the brochure says. In some units, it may not exist in the Army. Still, you can count on another soldier to lend a hand when needed. Fast forward to early March, less than 30 days in the Army, and my wife and I were discussing options – the career skills location was becoming less and less communicative about a job offer, and we needed to decide the future.

 

One of the recent speakers at Military Mentors’ MMoment IV, Dr. Ruth Gotian, highlighted the importance of having a constellation or a network of mentors. Having this constellation of mentors is vital because having one mentor merely gives you one perspective; having multiple mentors enables you to gather many perspectives to have a clearer picture and allow better decision-making. Heeding this advice, I reached out to three mentors and voiced my concerns – the grass was not greener on the other side, but I had an off-ramp I could take – I could stay in the Army. I got to discuss my decision-making criteria and was asked some hard questions to answer – was I running from civilian life or to the Army? It was a complicated answer to provide because it was both.

 

I knew I couldn’t return to my previous unit or career field if I returned to the Army. I had too many bad memories and senior officers I couldn’t trust. However, I could try to change my career and pursue my passion for human resources. I could learn lessons from my first decade, could use what I’d learned about myself during my transition, and could apply it towards making the second decade of service better focused on supporting troops and focusing on positively impacting soldiers. Fortunately, the person who had reached out about my article saw potential in me. Instead of a person with outrageous ideas and no ability to make an impact, she saw a passionate junior officer who cared about the Army and taking care of soldiers.

 

So, I had my answer. I could return to the Army and realign my passion, purpose, and principles. I could continue taking care of my family. I could continue striving to impact those around me. I had a final check-in with my wife and submitted the request to withdraw my REFRAD and begin my journey to remain on active service.

 

On March 28th, I walked into my career skill location. I had just received confirmation that my REFRAD withdrawal had been approved and told my coordinator that I was returning to the Army. Three days before, I was supposed to be out of the Army. As it was a decade prior, I was excited to return to the Army. The sense of potential, the ability to improve, and being surrounded by incredible individuals will excite anyone to join. Unlike 14 years ago, I know what I am signing up for, and it somehow makes it even more exciting knowing that the Army is a place where I can be all I can be.




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