Our post comes from Ioannis Laganis, an active Army Officer in the Hellenic Armed Forces of Greece. He is currently assigned at the Hellenic Army Academy (HAA) where he serves at the Academy’s Office of International Cooperation.
Congratulations!
After hours of reading articles on self-improvement and listening to podcasts on the importance of seeking guidance to realize your full potential, you finally decided to take that pivotal step forward by searching for a mentor: a guiding figure that will aid you in navigating the -more often than not- uncharted waters of professional development.
Perhaps you are one of those fortunate few that have identified that charismatic individual in their networks, or even better, you have already formed the longed-for mentorship relationship.
Regardless of where you find yourself falling into that spectrum as you are going through these lines; there are a few actions you may undertake, to empower your mentor, and make the most of that challenging yet so rewarding developmental journey.
So, what does it take to be an effective mentee?
My military biases urge me to give me you the BLUF (Bottom Line Up Front), and to that end a military-like approach to the issue would suggest that:
An effective mentee has to be intentional, open, and proactive. (Easy right?)
Well, even though the aforementioned proposition seems rather straightforward in theory, there are nuances involved, and while the following short passage does not claim to be an exhaustive resource of the subject by any stretch of the imagination, it could act as a springboard in your attempt to form and sustain a fantastic mentorship relationship.
Knowing where you are going is everything and hence, being intentional by establishing a clear direction for the mentorship relationship is crucial. Mentorship may come in a variety of shapes and forms and identifying your motives (both intrinsic and extrinsic) in pursuing such a relationship will help you determine its nature.
Once you have conceptualized what you are hoping to gain from the mentoring process, communicate that to your mentor in detail: How long would you like for the mentorship to last? Is it driven by the need to tackle ad-hoc professional challenges, or do you aim for a relationship that will have a more holistic impact on your development? These are some of the most common questions arising at the formation of the relationship. By providing a comprehensive visualization of the end state to your mentor, you can ensure that both parties are aligned towards a common objective, thus increasing the likelihood of achieving the desired outcome(s).
It is also important to note that you do not have to force yourself. You are not expected to have formulated highly specific and/or tangible goals in advance. Those are essentially some of the main deliverables of the process. Be patient and moderate in your early expectations, as those deliverables are usually finalized towards the latter phases of the mentorship journey.
Successfully completing the introductory phase should result in a mutually accepted roadmap for the future, allowing you to enter the more practical aspect of the process, which traditionally includes a significant amount of oral (or written) communication. At that point you are strongly encouraged to practice an “active listening” approach during all of your interactions with your mentor.
Active listening is a prerequisite for a successful mentorship relationship and refers to your ability to be fully present and engaged in your encounters. Taking notes and following up with clarifying questions will demonstrate your genuine interest in the process and your eagerness to learn, further motivating your mentor to go above and beyond to meet that level of enthusiasm. By listening actively, you are bound to gain a deeper understanding of the pieces of advice and insights provided, while at the same time you are practically displaying your respect to your mentor’s time and support by making the most of every interaction.
In addition to articulating a well-defined pathway for the relationship, and practicing active listening, it is equally (if not more) important to come into the mentoring process with a receptive mindset. Being open to constructive feedback and criticism is fundamental in maintaining a productive partnership.
If your natural tendency is to receive feedback with skepticism, it is always useful to remain cognizant of the fact that your mentor is there to facilitate your growth and development, and this may sometimes involve the uncomfortable task of pointing out blind spots or areas that could be ameliorated. When that is the case, try viewing those instances as opportunities for growth, by reflecting on your mentor’s input and subsequently discuss with him possible solutions to improve the situations at hand.
Finally, an ideal mentee ought to be proactive in seeking out opportunities for growth and development. It was you who decided to embark on the mentorship journey, so do not be afraid to take the lead!
This may involve initiatives such as asking your mentor for additional resources, such as books, setting up meetings, and coming prepared with questions and ideas. It may also involve seeking out opportunities for networking or skill-building outside of your mentorship circle. Bear in mind that the responsibility to drive the relationship forward lies heavily with you as you were the instigator of the process.
In conclusion, we should approach mentorship in the context of interpersonal relationships, rather than a sterile, isolated tool for professional development, and in that sense, it can be indeed considered a form of art. The founding principles of the mentoring process should revolve around the concepts of reciprocity, intentionality, and authenticity, as the case would have been for any other successful human interaction. The actionable qualities of an effective mentee described briefly above; are meant to inspire you to delve into this exciting journey wholeheartedly, ultimately “leading” your mentor into a mutually beneficial developmental experience!
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